vaspider:

glitterarygetsit:

amuseoffyre:

morgauseoforkney:

nancybirch:

When I die I want to be buried with grave goods that make future archaeologists think I was of much higher status than I actually was so that my grave will be referred to as a princely burial and I’ll be remembered by some cool name like “The Colchester Barrow Princess” (I’ve decided that I will be buried in a highly visible barrow, possibly with a ship) and the National Trust will erect a small museum about me filled with entirely incorrect but cool sounding archaeological assumptions

Be buried literally holding a sword and axe and then sit back and watch the endless ‘powerful warrior queen v. just usual valuable grave goods indicating a high status individual’ debate from the afterlife.

I want a spring-loaded casket and non-degrading glitter. I will be remembered as “that *£^$% thing that killed Professor Hannover”

As an archaelogist I completely support this.

“Characteristic of 21st century society is the sharp delineation between the funerary practices of more conservative, traditionalist groups and the generally younger and more creative subcultures. While those who identified as more conservative nevertheless frequently included personal items in their grave goods, the individuality of their burials pales in comparison with the eccentricity and extravagance of the neoteric groups.  Funerary archaeologists have been hard pressed to find commonalities between these individualistic burials. It is likely that members of these subgroups competed to include the most unique ritual items amongst the grave goods of the deceased.

One example from Colchester could be read as a highly detailed homage to the seventh-century Taplow boat burial. Dendrochronology of the vessel dates the burial to the mid- to late-21st century. The opulence of the burial is at odds with what we know of contemporary social structure. As such, it is likely that the deceased or their family wished to indicate a strong connection to the area by aligning their identity with the Anglo-Saxon royal history of the region.

Another example, this one from Milton Keynes, included a bewildering array of items. Archaeologists uncovered a Tudor coin, a Whitney Houston CD, and a mobile phone inscribed “Bite me, historians”. Taken together, these grave goods indicate a disdain for archaeological research and the reconstruction of identity using material culture. It is possible that members of this subgroup sought to use creative anachronism to conceal the date of their death. Some researchers have argued that individuals buried under similar circumstances believed that this knowledge could be used for identity fraud or necromancy.

There has been some research done into the psychological trauma associated with excavating human remains. Most of this research has focused on the emotional challenges of excavating mass graves resulting from genocide or plague, with the occasional footnote regarding individual burials (such as the excavation of a lead coffin in Whitechapel which produced a fountain of liquefied Roman remains when the air seal was pierced). It is my view, however, that further research in this field is urgently needed following the sad and horrifying events of the recent excavations on Orkney. I am sure I do not need to go into further detail about the dig that shook our discipline to the core, and will refrain from doing so. For those of a gruesome persuasion, the full excavation report has been lodged with the ADS. Field archaeologists are advised to wear protective clothing including goggles and, where possible, shields when excavating graves of this period.

Professor Hannover is sincerely missed and a monograph of papers in her honour is scheduled for publication next year.”

… it got better.

(Source: bimbogollum)

snime:

tobeagenius:

“You are the universe, expressing itself as a human for a little while”

image

thelesbianmanhater2000:

We really need to start making older men AFRAID of seeing girls in their late teens as potential partners.

‘But she’s so emotionally mature’

No NONCE she ain’t!!!!! ‘Emotionally mature’ compared to what? She’s a baby!!! Her willingness to carry YOUR bullshit and nurse your ego is not emotional maturity!

Men are just scared to date women their own age bc they are so transparently fucking pathetic and selfish and utterly undesirable and know that women w more life experience will recognise those things about them immediately. Fucking losers

(Source: chavdog)

timetrees:

since it’s hanukkah and people might be paying attention to jewish people for once, some stuff to note

  • don’t call a jewish person a jew unless you know they’re okay with being called that
  • antisemitism is still very real (you’d be surprised how many people ‘forget’ this)
  • goyim (or gentile) means non-jewish people, goy is singular.
  • undermining and erasing jewish traditions is antisemitism
  • if you say to ‘get over the holocaust’ or anything along those lines i will come over and bash your head in with our spare menorah
  • Don’t tell someone they can’t be Jewish because “they don’t look like a Jew.” That’s not for you to decide.

EDIT: this post is going around again and i’m not really sure why. i know it isn’t hanukkah, this was made last year. and some jewish people don’t like being called jews because the word jew is often used in a negative light (“jew nose”, “greedy jew”, etc) and we don’t like goyim saying those things.

abstractandedgyname:

persverso:

the universe: okay, you’re a human. I gave you free will and a conscious mind, so you’re free to do whatever you want. So what do you wanna do?

human: GO FAST

the universe: well, you’re a perfect pursuit predator but if that’s the way you want to evolve, go ahead.

human, climbing on a horse: GO FAST

the universe: wait what

human, inventing the carriage, the car and the bullet train: GO FASTER

the universe: I IMPLORE YOU TO STOP

human, trying to figure out lightspeed travel: FAS T ER

human: 

image

THEORETICALLY MAXIMUM FAST

the universe:

image

(Source: keuhkopussirotta)

curioscurio:
“ not-the-conversation-starter:
“ curioscurio:
“I FEEL GOD IN THIS CHILIS TONIGHT
”
Vine coming back WILL NOT MATTER if Net Neutrality is gone, remember that!
”
This is an excellent reminder!! We need Net Neutrality or else you’ll have...

curioscurio:

not-the-conversation-starter:

curioscurio:

I FEEL GOD IN THIS CHILIS TONIGHT

Vine coming back WILL NOT MATTER if Net Neutrality is gone, remember that!

This is an excellent reminder!! We need Net Neutrality or else you’ll have to pay an extra $20 for 8 seconds of video! Keep fighting for it !

thefingerfuckingfemalefury:

kieren-fucking-walker:

disease-danger-darkness-silence:

icbiwf:

boydivisionss:

do u ever remember all the horrible offensve things u said when u were like 15 and u literally feel ur soul detach and turn 2 dust 

your fave is problematic: yourself

Basically, yeah. That’s kind of the point – you always have to look back on yourself and be mortified and resolve to be better.

Shit, the stuff I said just five YEARS ago (and I’m almost 33) makes me cringe like a motherfucker.

Burn in mortification. Rise from the ashes and be better. Lather, rinse, repeat for the rest of your life.

This is why purity culture doesn’t work!!! We’re all shit! We can all grow and do better!

^ This is so true

We have all screwed up

The odds are we are all gonna screw up again. The important thing is to try and learn and change and improve

(Source: autoneurotic)

video description: a person stands in a living room and has musical bells strapped to their body. wearing one as a hat, one on each buttock, hilarious. the bells all look like brightly coloured boobs. the person taps the bit that looks like a nipple and the bells make sounds. they proceed with tapping their bellboobs and perform a Christmas song medley. It’s magnificent.

(Source: twitter.com)

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A post shared by Greg Baskwell (@gregbaskwell)

surprisebitch:

theboycourt:

valykas:

This is amazing

Ok but how did they make it look like he was driving

this deserves an academy award nomination

(Source: disneydorito)

theconcealedweapon:

If people have to buy your overpriced medicine because medical marijuana as an alternative is illegal, that’s government intervention.

If you can price gouge because the government enforces patent laws prohibiting other people from selling the product at a lower price, or if you can patent a cure for a disease but never use it, that’s government intervention.

If the government labels victimless actions as crimes, imprisons people guilty of those actions, and allows you to use them as a source of cheap labor, that’s government intervention.

One can even argue that without government intervention, property ownership wouldn’t even exist because there’d be no way to enforce it.

Rich people rely on government intervention more than anyone else. To them, it’s only “evil big government” when poor people use it.